4 hours away from everything I know. I went from spending 100% of my time traveling around the area to visit friends and boyfriends. Now I spend all my time applying for jobs and watching netflix. I feel this constant loneliness and desire to be around people who love me. I love my life up here, don’t get me wrong. I’m working on making friends and I love living with my partner but I miss everything so much. Getting out of bed has been a little difficult but I do it. I’m keeping to a schedule which is helping.
The apartment is getting more comfortable now. We have a bed, rug, and I’ve decorated the bathroom. I have a guy who I plan on meeting up with ….even though I just remembered I said I might not be dating for a while. Obviously I like dating. I miss PA quite a lot, but of course I expected that. What I didn’t expect is how much he misses me. Before I left he wasn’t treated me very well, but of course he’s new to poly so mistakes will be made. Now though, he’s been amazing. Better than he ever was. It honestly breaks my heart to not call him my boyfriend, but boyfriends always treat me well, they come and visit, and they certainly don’t break their promises and not check in with me. Boyfriend is an earned title and he hasn’t earned it this time around. So here we are. I’m happy, but also not. It’s confusing but I wouldn’t have done anything differently. No regrets.